So you have a story to tell. You have the plot, some
dynamite characters, and you have chosen your point of view. Last
month I wrote, "As you are writing, pay special attention to point
of view. If the point of view does not work, you can always go back
and start again. Unless you must meet a deadline because of a
contract, writing is more often a long-term commitment and an
endurance marathon, than a sprint. Don’t become frustrated. If you
have to, experiment and work on a story from several viewpoints and
figure out which works best. When writing, remember, play is good."
This month I’d like to provide a couple of tips to help maintain
point of view.
- Remain Consistent
: Don’t change point of view in the
middle of a scene. If you are working in the omniscient viewpoint,
be careful that the shift is not jarring. While the plot might
take your reader on a rollercoaster ride, the point of view should
not. I have written of this rule in all of my earlier articles.
Past articles may be accessed by clicking on the Past Issues
link at the top of this page.
- Beware of Pronouns
: Remember pronouns must have an
antecedent noun. In other words, first use the specific noun, then
the pronoun. Go from specific to general.
Here is an example of how poor crafting of pronouns can blur
point of view. A good writer must take note and not rely on the
reader to sort it out.
- "Two shots rang out and she flinched. Jenny's stomach twisted
into a dozen knots and the bile in her stomach made its bitterness
known in the back of her mouth."
Questions immediately arise. Who is she? Is she the
same person as Jenny?
The fix here is easy. If she and Jenny are the same, make
Jenny the antecedent noun. All else follows:
- Two shots rang out and Jenny flinched. Her stomach twisted
into a dozen knots and the bile in her stomach made its bitterness
known in the back of her mouth.
Now if Jenny and she are not the same person,
substitute the name for the pronoun. Here:
- Two shots rang out and Robin flinched. Jenny’s stomach twisted
into a dozen knots and the bile in her stomach made its bitterness
known in the back of her mouth.
Notice how the viewpoint in the last example has changed from
third-person limited to omniscient. The author not only sees Robin
flinch, but knows what is happening to Jenny’s internal plumbing. So
be careful. If the author intends to maintain control and the
limited voice, then the passage will need greater care and more
reworking. Example:
- Two shots rang out and Jenny
saw Robin flinch. Her stomach twisted into a dozen knots and the
bile in her stomach made its bitterness known in the back of her
mouth.
Here limited viewpoint is
maintained. We see and feel what the viewpoint character, Jenny,
sees and feels. You might ask,
"But don’t we have two
antecedent nouns? Won't that make the "her" ambiguous? Even if
limited voice has been consistent, couldn’t the reader still misread
the second sentence?"
Good question, but there should be no problem. In the example,
Two shots rang out and Jenny saw Robin flinch. Her
stomach twisted into a dozen knots and the bile in her stomach made
its bitterness known in the back of her mouth, Jenny
is the one seeing Robin flinch. Robin does not see Jenny watching
her flinch. Jenny, therefore, retains her place as the point-of-view
character, and "Her stomach," which is the subject of
the next sentence, relates to Jenny and not Robin.
"Remain Consistent" and "Beware
of Pronouns" is a short list I know, but they are the
essentials.
Now go play and write, write,
write. Have fun and don’t let point of view intimidate you. I wish
you peace and may the muses be with you!